Stuck in a Grey Area

Yea, so I've been struggling with doubt lately. Mostly doubt about where I stand in relation to God. I haven't exactly been a shining beacon of what it means to be a follower of Jesus, in fact I have questioned lately whether I can even correctly claim that I'm a follower. I haven't attended church in a while, though I can't say that I really believe this is the root of the issue. More importantly, I would say that I have been avoiding the people of God. I have found myself becoming more consumed by my job, and as a result I am conveniently allowed myself to make excuses for not making time for spirituality. As a result, I have not been very spiritual lately. In fact, I don't talk about it much at work, and I'd prefer that people there didn't know that I do have a spiritual life. It sounds terrible, but I'd be pretty embarrassed for people to find out that I have some sort of faith in Jesus, because lately I haven't been living it. I think the root of this cause for me is lack of community with the people of God. My wife and I have attempted to find such community, but I don't feel that we have met anyone else truly seeking it who live here in Savannah. Those whom we know that might be interested in such community are too busy with their own lives. The churches that we have attended seeking such community are filled with people who are more interested in a church program centered type of community. I believe in this day, however, its unrealistic for people's lives to revolve around a church with its activities. Church should be about people living in community with each other and God, bottom line. Though I doubt where I stand in relation to God, and especially in relation to the people of God. I want to strive to do better and not be paralyzed by uncertainly and my comfortable lifestyle (lately) of not seeking God. Pray for me and my wife Heather as we do this, and pray that we find authentic community and cultivate a desire to actually be who we are supposed to be in relation to God and his people.